In the midst of frigidness trying to find light

Last time I checked I lived on the cusp of the South, not in New England. This year's winter has been, as anyone in Virginia can tell you, a massive unloading of frozen precipitation on our otherwise mild winter months. Local news has taken this one giant wintry mix and run. From the preemptive warnings, to the during-the-storm broadcasts (picture the idiots out in the billowing 40mph winds carrying umbrellas, as if it will actually help, all the while collecting snow atop their shoulders, much like the car they are standing next to), to the fury surrounding millions of potholes throughout our bustling (ha) city streets. The news must go on.

Amid the winter storm, another has been brewing in my oh-so-insignificant little life. Ok, I know my life is very significant, but I am allowed to look at the dark side sometimes, right? It happened last year around this time. Heartbreak. How does one "get over it" so easily? Especially in the middle of the cold, in the middle of being stuck inside with all the time in the world. To think. And to drink.

This isn't going to be a love/relationship/hear my desperation type blog, but it just so happens that this is going on in my life right now, and it always helps to vent, even if there are no responses. Just to write it down - and today I am a faster typist than writer. I am just now, after weeks of analyzing the things that were said versus the things that were not proved, realizing so much about my own mind - about what has been engrained in me as a 25 year old working woman. In one sense, I feel so young and unsure about love, work, friends, life. On the other side, I see what other 25 year olds are doing and think, wow I need to grow up and get some confidence to make myself happy. To not depend on someone else to do that for me. I am pretty sure that I have grabbed onto someone with such a hopeful expectation for what he could be for me, that I have lost myself. It sounds corny, but it seems that I lost the most important person to me, myself as a best friend. Now I am on my way to finding her again, and it's exciting.